Lesbian Sex Positions: 12 Ideas to Try, With Diagrams

Sex between women isn’t one thing. It’s hands, mouths, bodies pressed together, toys, and whatever the two of you invent along the way. These 12 positions are a starting point: some are classics, some are about comfort, and all of them can be adapted to your bodies.

Each diagram uses two simple figures, blue and orange, so you can see where everyone goes. Who’s who is up to you: any of these work either way round.

Before you start

• Talk about it. What you’d like to try, what’s off the table, and a simple “stop” or safeword if you want one. Our sexy questions to ask your partner are an easy way in.
• Gather pillows. A pillow under the hips, behind a back or under the knees fixes most awkward angles.
• Have lube nearby. It makes fingers, toys and grinding more comfortable. Water-based works with everything.
• Short nails, clean hands. Simple, but it matters for anything involving fingers.

1. Scissoring

The best-known lesbian sex position, and the one people joke about most. You lie facing each other, legs interlocked, and press and grind your vulvas together. It takes some shuffling to find the right angle, so go slowly, use lube, and laugh when it doesn’t work first time. Propping one partner’s hips on a pillow often helps.

2. Grinding, one partner on top

One partner lies on her back; the other lies on top and grinds against her partner’s thigh, hip or vulva. It’s close, easy to kiss in, and the partner on top controls the rhythm. Switch who’s on top, or have the partner underneath press a thigh up for more pressure.

3. Edge of the bed

One of the most comfortable positions for oral sex. The receiver sits or lies back at the edge of the bed; the giver kneels on a cushion on the floor, at just the right height, with no strain on their neck. Hands are free for touching too. If it’s too high or low, change the cushion or move to a lower seat.

4. Face sitting

The receiver kneels astride her partner’s face and lowers herself to a comfortable height, keeping her weight on her knees. She sets the pace; her partner sets the limits. Agree a tap signal first, since the partner underneath may not be able to speak. Our face sitting guide covers how to do it comfortably.

5. Spooning

Lazy, intimate and good for long sessions. The partner behind reaches around with her fingers or a vibrator, kissing her partner’s neck while she’s at it. The partner in front can guide her hand. Great for mornings once you’re both awake, or the end of a long day.

6. Lap sitting, facing each other

One partner sits up against the headboard; the other straddles her lap. You’re face to face, so it’s full of eye contact and kissing, and both of you have your hands free to touch each other at the same time. The partner on top can grind against a thigh too.

7. 69, side by side

Lying on your sides, head to toe, each with your mouth on the other. Side by side is far kinder on necks than one partner on top, and it’s easier to pause and enjoy yourself when it’s your turn to be the focus. Rest your head on your partner’s thigh.

8. Missionary, with fingers or a toy

One partner lies back, knees bent; the other kneels or lies beside her and uses her fingers or a toy. Simple, but you can watch each other’s faces, kiss, and talk. A pillow under the receiver’s hips changes the angle. Lying beside rather than between her legs saves your wrist.

9. From behind

The receiver is on her knees, or lies face down with a pillow under her hips, while her partner reaches from behind with her hand or a toy. It’s a different angle that some people love, and it feels a little more dominant, if that’s your thing. Add some light spanking if you’ve both agreed to it.

10. With a strap-on

Most positions here work with a strap-on too: missionary, from behind, on top, spooning and at the edge of the bed. Our lesbian strap-on guide covers choosing a harness, the first time, and six positions with diagrams.

11. Mutual touching

Lie side by side and touch each other at the same time, or touch yourselves and watch each other. It’s a brilliant way to learn exactly what your partner likes: watch how she touches herself, then try it.

12. In the bath or shower

Somewhere warm, slippery and private, with lots of skin. Use a non-slip mat, keep it slow, and remember that water washes lube away, so a silicone lube lasts longer (but don’t use it on silicone toys). Keep it to your own bathroom, never anywhere the public could see or hear.

Make it kinky

Any of these positions can include a blindfold, a scarf around the wrists, or one partner taking charge. Our lesbian BDSM guide covers power dynamics, negotiation and first scenes, and the list of kinks has plenty more to explore.

Safer sex between women

• STIs can pass between women through oral sex, fingers, skin contact and shared toys.
• Use barriers if you’re not both tested and exclusive: dental dams or a cut-open condom for oral, gloves for fingers if you like.
• Toys: put a fresh condom on anything you share, or wash it between partners and between anal and vaginal use.
• Get tested regularly, and talk to a doctor or sexual health clinic about anything that worries you.

Stop if…

• Anything hurts in a sharp or worrying way, rather than just feeling intense.
• A neck, wrist, hip or knee starts to ache. Change position.
• Either of you wants to stop, slow down or switch, for any reason.

Afterwards

Cuddle, drink some water, and talk about what you loved. It’s the easiest way to make next time even better. That’s aftercare, and it’s for every kind of sex, not just kink.

Want to know what your partner’s curious about? Fill in our yes/no/maybe list separately: it only shows the things you both said yes or maybe to. Or warm up with a round of lesbian truth or dare.