Sub Tasks: 100 Ideas for Daily Tasks, Rules and Rewards

Tasks are one of the easiest ways to keep a dynamic alive between scenes. A small instruction from your dom, done well and noticed, can make an ordinary Tuesday feel like part of something. This list has 100 sub tasks to choose from, from everyday self-care and service to protocol, private teasing and long-distance ideas, plus rewards for subs and a word on punishments.

Doms: use these as a starting point and adjust them to your sub. Subs: it’s fine to bring this list to your dom and point at the ones you’d love. Everything here is for consenting adults.

How to set tasks well

• Negotiate first. Agree what kinds of tasks are welcome, how many, and how often, before any get set. Our negotiation checklist helps.
• Keep them realistic. A task should fit a busy day. One to three daily tasks is plenty to start.
• Never risk real life. No task should put a sub’s job, health, money, sleep or relationships with other people at risk.
• Keep sexy tasks private. Nothing anyone else could see or hear, in public or at work. Something worn under clothes that only you know about is fine; anything on show is not.
• Any task can be refused. A safeword works on tasks too, and saying no is never punished.
• Check in regularly. Once a week, talk about which tasks feel good and which feel like homework, and change them.

Daily and self-care tasks

Good dominants care about their sub’s wellbeing. These tasks build it into the dynamic.

1. Drink an agreed amount of water each day and report the total at night.
2. Take any medication you’re prescribed on time, and send a quick “done”.
3. Be in bed by an agreed time on work nights.
4. Write down three things you did well today.
5. Stretch for ten minutes when you wake up.
6. Go for a 20-minute walk and tell your dom one thing you noticed.
7. Eat a proper breakfast and send a photo of it.
8. Journal for ten minutes about how the dynamic is making you feel.
9. Do your skincare routine morning and night, with no skipping.
10. Put your phone away an hour before bed.
11. Tidy one small area of your home each day.
12. Write down one thing you’re grateful for about your dom.
13. Lay out tomorrow’s outfit and get it approved.
14. Spend 15 minutes on a hobby you’ve been neglecting.
15. Read ten pages of a book your dom chose for you.
16. Send a good morning message saying how you slept.
17. Cook yourself one healthy meal from scratch this week.
18. Stand up and stretch every couple of hours during the workday.
19. Say one kind thing to yourself in the mirror each morning.
20. Rate your energy from 1 to 10 each evening, so your dom can adjust tomorrow’s tasks.

Service tasks

For subs who feel most submissive when they’re useful. Our guide to being a service sub goes deeper.

21. Make your dom’s coffee or tea exactly how they like it, every morning.
22. Run them a bath when they’ve had a long day.
23. Give them a foot rub after work.
24. Lay out their clothes for tomorrow.
25. Learn to cook their favorite dish, and get it right.
26. Keep their drink topped up during an evening in.
27. Polish their shoes or boots.
28. Pack their lunch for the next day.
29. Take over a chore they hate, for a week.
30. Keep a notebook of their preferences, from how they take their toast to which pillow they like.
31. Give them a 15-minute shoulder massage, no reminders needed.
32. Brush their hair.
33. Greet them at the door in a way you’ve agreed.
34. Set the table and serve dinner before sitting down yourself.
35. Change the bed sheets each week and make the bed neatly every morning.
36. Remove their shoes when they come home.
37. Plan a date night for them, down to the last detail.
38. Clean and put away toys and gear after every scene.
39. Run an errand for them, on your own time.
40. Ask each evening, “Is there anything else I can do for you?”

Obedience and protocol tasks

Structure for subs who love rules. See our guide to BDSM rules and protocols for setting them up, and our list of sub names and dom names for what to call each other.

41. Use your dom’s title whenever you’re alone together.
42. Ask permission before touching yourself.
43. Kneel for five minutes when your dom gets home, in private.
44. Learn and practice a set of positions, like kneeling and standing at attention.
45. Wear your day collar every day.
46. Answer every instruction during a scene with “yes, Sir” or “yes, Ma’am”.
47. Copy out your rules by hand once a week.
48. Report any broken rules honestly at the end of the day.
49. Wait to be invited before joining your dom on the sofa in the evening.
50. Write 25 lines of a sentence your dom chooses.
51. Let your dom choose your underwear each day.
52. Send a short end-of-day report: what you did, what you found hard, how you feel.
53. Stand when your dom enters the room, at home.
54. Use the same greeting and goodbye ritual every time.
55. Recite your safeword and the rules at the start of every scene.

Teasing and sexy tasks

Private, between the two of you, and only within limits you’ve agreed.

56. Edge three times today, and don’t come without permission.
57. Wear something under your clothes that only you and your dom know about.
58. Send a voice note, from somewhere private, telling your dom what you want tonight.
59. Go without underwear at home all evening.
60. Write down a fantasy in detail and read it aloud to your dom tonight.
61. Ask permission every time you want to come, for a whole week. See orgasm denial.
62. Be waiting naked and kneeling at the time your dom chooses.
63. Touch yourself for five minutes, stop, and message your dom how close you got.
64. Wear the underwear or lingerie your dom picks to bed.
65. Pick a toy for tonight and leave it on the bed for your dom to find.
66. Give your dom a slow striptease to a song they choose.
67. Practice a lap dance and perform it tonight.
68. Kiss your dom every time you walk past them, all evening.
69. Tell your dom, in your own words, exactly what you’d love them to do to you.
70. Wear nothing but a ribbon tied round your wrist when they come to bed.
71. Let your dom set the pace tonight: you only speed up when you’re told to.
72. Thank your dom properly, out loud, after every orgasm they give you.
73. Spend ten minutes worshipping a part of your dom’s body they choose.
74. Go down on your dom whenever they ask, for one evening at home.
75. Write five things you’d love to try and leave the list under their pillow.

Long-distance tasks

For dynamics that run over messages and calls. Only send photos you’d be comfortable with if they ever got out, and leave your face out of anything intimate.

76. Send a good morning and goodnight message in an agreed format.
77. Edge on a video call while your dom watches and tells you when to stop.
78. Send a photo of your outfit each morning.
79. Sleep in something that belongs to your dom.
80. Write a letter by hand and mail it to them.
81. Watch the same film at the same time and message each other through it.
82. Tick off your daily tasks on a shared checklist.
83. Record a voice note telling your dom what you miss most about them.
84. Only touch yourself when your dom tells you to, by message, for a week.
85. Plan your next scene together for when you’re in the same room.

Rewards for subs

A reward should feel like attention and approval, not just a prize. Specific praise is often the best one of all (borrow from our praise kink phrases). Everyday care and affection are never something a sub has to earn; rewards are extras on top.

86. Specific praise: tell them exactly what they did well and why it pleased you.
87. Let them choose the next scene.
88. Permission to come.
89. A long massage, with no tasks expected in return.
90. A new toy or piece of gear they’ve been wanting.
91. A night off from all tasks.
92. Their favorite meal, cooked by you.
93. A sticker chart, with stars that add up to a bigger treat.
94. Choosing the film or the takeout.
95. Being invited up onto the bed or sofa, for pet play dynamics.
96. A handwritten love letter from their dom.
97. Choosing their own outfit for a day.
98. A date you plan entirely for them.
99. A charm for their collar, or a new day collar.
100. A new name or title, chosen together, to mark how far they’ve come.

Punishments: keep them playful and agreed

Plenty of dynamics use small punishments, especially with a brat who breaks rules on purpose. Done well, they’re part of the game: agreed in advance, quick, and over once they’re done. Playful punishment ideas for subs include writing lines, a few minutes of corner time, an agreed number of spanks, or losing a small privilege like choosing the film.

A few rules keep them safe:

• Agree the menu in advance. A sub should know what punishments are possible before any are used.
• Never withhold care, food, sleep, money or affection. These are needs, not privileges.
• Nothing that harms, physically or emotionally, and nothing in front of other people.
• Never punish in anger. If you’re genuinely upset, step out of the dynamic and talk as equals.
• Never punish a safeword, a refused task, or honesty about a broken rule.
• Real problems need real conversations. If a task keeps being missed, the task probably needs changing.

Stop if…

Pause the tasks and talk if:

• Tasks start to feel like stress, dread or a second job rather than something you look forward to.
• Real life is suffering: sleep, work, money, health or friendships.
• A sub feels anxious about failing, or low after a run of tasks (a form of sub drop).
• Tasks are being used to cut someone off from friends, family or money. That’s a warning sign of abuse, not a dynamic.

Make the list your own

The best tasks are the ones you design together. Pick a handful from this list, try them for a week, then sit down and talk about what felt good. If you’d like to write your agreements down, our BDSM contract guide shows how. Our guides to being a dom and being a good sub cover the bigger picture of a D/s relationship, and the full list of kinks has ideas for scenes to reward all that good work.