Threesome Types: FFM, MMF, MFM and FMF Meaning Explained

FFM, MMF, MFM and FMF are shorthand for who’s involved in a threesome. The letters stand for the people taking part, M for a man and F for a woman, and the order often hints at how the three of them interact. They’re used constantly in dating profiles, apps, and online communities, so it helps to know what people usually mean, and where the shorthand stops being reliable.

If you’re planning one rather than just decoding the letters, our step-by-step guide on how to have a threesome covers the conversations, safer sex, and the morning after. For what to actually do on the night, our guide to threesome sex positions rounds up the best FFM and MMF positions.

How to read the letters

There are two parts to the convention:

1. The letters say who’s there. Two Fs and an M means two women and one man, whatever the order.
2. The middle letter is often the focus. By common convention, the person in the middle is the one the other two are focused on, and the people on either side aren’t necessarily sexual with each other. When the two matching letters sit side by side (FFM, MMF), it usually signals that those two are sexual with each other.

That second part isn’t a rule everyone follows. Plenty of people write FFM and MFF interchangeably, or use whichever order comes to mind. Treat the letters as a starting point and ask.

Two women and one man

• FFM (or MFF): two women and one man, usually with the two women also being sexual with each other. This is the setup most people picture when they hear “threesome”, and one of the most searched.
• FMF: the man in the middle as the focus of both women, who may not be interested in each other at all. Worth clarifying early, since “both women are bi and into each other” and “both women are only into him” are very different evenings.

Two men and one woman

• MFM: the woman in the middle as the focus, with the two men focused on her and not being sexual with each other. This is often what people mean by a “devil’s threesome”.
• MMF (or FMM): two men and one woman, usually with the two men also being sexual with each other, which typically means at least one of them is bi or pan.

Mixing up MFM and MMF is one of the most common misunderstandings on apps, and it matters, because one involves the two men touching and the other doesn’t. If you’re one of the men, be clear about which you mean.

Other combinations

• FFF: three women.
• MMM: three men.
• “Unicorn”: not a configuration but a role. It’s the community nickname for a single person, usually a bisexual woman, who joins an existing couple. See our threesome guide for how to treat a third as a person rather than an accessory.
• Hotwife and cuckquean setups: where one partner is with someone else while the other watches or hears about it. See hotwife and cuckquean.

When the letters don’t fit

The letters assume everyone is a man or a woman, and that gender predicts what someone wants. Neither is true for everyone. Trans and nonbinary people use this shorthand in different ways, and many people skip it entirely. It’s always clearer to say who’s involved and what each person is and isn’t up for in plain words. Our yes/no/maybe list is an easy way for three people to compare what they’re each into.

Which setup is right for you?

That comes down to what everyone actually wants, not the letters. The questions that matter are who’s attracted to whom, what’s on and off the table, and whether anything is reserved for an existing couple. Our guide on how to have a threesome walks through that conversation, threesome positions covers setups that work for any mix, and the survey data on our kink popularity page shows how common the threesome fantasy really is.