Pony Play: What It Is and How People Do It

Pony play is a kind of pet play where one partner takes on the role of a horse or pony, and the other becomes their trainer, owner, handler or rider. Compared with the bouncy, affectionate feel of puppy play, pony play is usually more about discipline, posture, training and being shown off.

What a pony play scene looks like

There’s no single way to do it, but common elements include:

• Training: learning commands, walking or trotting with a high step, holding a proud posture.
• Grooming and care: being brushed, fed, watered and fussed over by the trainer.
• Presentation: being dressed in gear and shown off, sometimes at specialist events.
• Work: pulling a light cart (for experienced players), or carrying the trainer for a short time.
• Discipline: correction with a voice, a touch, or a light riding crop, as agreed.

The pony usually doesn’t speak, and communicates with snorts, stamps and nods instead. That makes agreeing a non-verbal safe signal especially important.

The gear

None of this is needed to start, but it’s a big part of the appeal for many:

• Head harness or bridle, sometimes with a bit, a bar held lightly between the teeth.
• Reins attached to the bridle or a body harness.
• Hoof boots and hoof gloves, which change how the pony stands and moves.
• A tail, often attached to a harness or belt.
• Blinkers, which limit side vision.

Why people enjoy it

• Headspace. Letting go of speech and everyday responsibilities to become, for a while, simply a pony.
• Structure. Training, rules and progress appeal to people who enjoy D/s dynamics.
• Pride and display. Being groomed, dressed up and admired.
• For trainers: the care, control and patience of bringing a pony on.

Starting safely

1. Talk first. Agree what’s in and out, whether it’s sexual, and a non-verbal safe signal, like stamping three times or dropping something. Our negotiation checklist helps.
2. Start without gear. A short scene with simple commands and grooming is enough to find out if you like it.
3. Go easy on bodies. Pad any kneeling, avoid riding at first, and take breaks.
4. Be careful with bits and blinkers. Bits can make jaws ache and make speech hard; blinkers make it easy to trip. Use them only in a clear space and for short periods.
5. Keep it private, at home or at an adult event where everyone has agreed to be there.

Stop if…

• The pony gives the safe signal, or seems distressed rather than in the role.
• There’s pain in the back, knees, wrists or jaw.
• Anyone trips or falls, or the space gets cluttered.

Afterwards

Coming out of a pony headspace can take a moment. Remove gear, offer water and something to eat, talk in your normal voices, and make time for aftercare. If you’re the trainer, our guide to being a handler in pet play covers the role in more depth.

Curious about other animal roles? See kitten play and puppy play, or browse the roleplay section of our list of kinks.